


After

by beyvader



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flashbacks, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:14:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25395187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beyvader/pseuds/beyvader
Summary: rey thinks about ben and his choices. (set right after the last force bond scene)
Relationships: Finn/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	After

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this fic three days after i first watched tlj! i never posted it bc i didn't really think much of it, but now it's a bit sad to read. i love rey, ben, and finn very much, and i really had so much fun writing this during my post tlj high.

Rey closes the gangway and watches the kneeling form of Kylo Ren disappear, but even then she can still feel him. Rey feels his heart slow, his head hang in sadness. She remembers feeling his heart race when they touched hands, remembers how her own had done the same, but what he had offered her….it just isn’t what she wants. She had been certain he had come to his senses in Snoke’s throne room, but she was wrong. As she walks to the cockpit, Rey holds her tears back, trying to remind herself that Finn is okay, that he’s with her now. 

Her time with Luke was short-lived, and honestly, Rey wasn’t even sure she’d enjoyed it so much, but his death weighed on her. She watched Leia as she stared at the  _ Falcon’s _ interior and wondered what she must be feeling. She has lost not only her husband and child, but now her brother. At least Luke died with peace and purpose, but still, Rey knows it has to hurt, and beyond that, her Resistance is depleted, left with only a few dozen beings. 

Chewbacca insists on her getting sleep, so Rey relieves herself of her co-pilot duties. The last time she got more than four hours of sleep was when she was on Ahch-To, and with her wounds still a little fresh from the fight back in the throne room, Rey feels herself falling asleep. The only thing that had been keeping her awake was the adrenaline from the fight on Crait and the heaviness in her chest that she cannot place. When her heads hits her pillow, Rey closes her eyes and sleeps only a little before she awakens to Finn hovering over her.

“Finn?” 

The former stormtrooper smiles widely at her. “Rey.” He pulls her into another hug, and Rey sniffles at his embrace. Not too long ago, she wasn’t sure when she would be able to talk to him again. 

When he pulls away, Finn asks, “So, what happened?”

Rey sits up and furrows her eyebrows. “What d’you mean?” 

“With Skywalker!” Finn replies. “You haven’t told me anything yet.”

“Oh, right,” Rey says. “Luke was….not what I expected. That island was so strange, Finn. There was this tree. It had the old Jedi texts inside of it, and before I left, I took them. I wasn’t gonna let Luke burn it down or something.”

“So, he’s gone?” 

Rey nods once. “He died in peace though. Did he really show up on Crait?”

“Yeah, he fought Kylo Ren, went up against the whole First Order, but then he just disappeared.”

Kylo Ren. The name makes Rey tense up, so she changes the subject. She immediately thinks of the tender looks Finn had given his new friend who’d been hurt in the battle. “What about you? What did you and Rose do?”

“I told you, she came with me to Canto Bight and helped me get on Snoke’s ship before it got sliced. She saved me, Rey.” Finn stops for a moment and seems to be unsure of what to say. “You’ll like her. She’s a good one.” 

“I hope I can meet her soon,” Rey tells him. 

“So, did Luke teach you anything?”

“Not much. Just what the Force is, what the Jedi did.”

“Why did you leave?”

Rey looks away for a moment. “He wasn’t what I thought he was. He lied to me, so I left.”

“So, this whole time you were on that island?”

Finn deserves to know the truth, but Rey cannot bring herself to tell him what happened aboard Snoke’s flagship or even the things that happened on Ahch-To that didn’t involve Luke. If he knew, Rey doesn’t think he would forgive her for having sympathy for the man that hurt him back on Starkiller Base. It would be even worse if he knew what had happened between them. Rey just can’t bring herself to tell him. Maybe one day, but it won’t be anytime soon.

“We left just before they started firing on the transports,” Rey explains. “Chewie and I followed the fleet, and we ended up on Crait.” 

“How’d you get that?” Finn asks, tilting his head toward the cut near her shoulder.

The image of the Praetorian Guard’s sword going through her shoulder plagues her mind. Ben looking over at her as soon as she yelped in pain. 

“A thorn on the island,” Rey answers quickly, pulling her sleeve down. “Jedi training is not very safe.”

“Neither is trying to get onto a Star Destroyer, but that Admiral Holdo, she went lightspeed right into the ship.”

Rey remembers the devastation of the ship after both she and Ben had been blown back by each other’s power. The Skywalker lightsaber torn in two, Rey picked up both halves before she walked over to see if Ben was alright. His long waves of hair strewn over his face, Ben was knocked out unconscious.

In that moment, Rey knelt down next to him and brushed his locks out of his face, wondering if he would awaken. When he only stirred, Rey got up, and with one last inhale, she turned away and left with her broken lightsaber. If Luke didn’t want it, and Ben didn’t deserve it, then it was hers. She found Snoke’s escape craft and left, not knowing if Ben might pursue her. He would pursue the Resistance for sure, but if he awakened now, Rey knew he would never let her leave, and Rey wasn’t sure if she could deny him again.

“I can’t believe you made it out,” Rey sighs, breaking herself from her own reverie. “Finn, I was so worried about you.” She sniffles. “I’m sorry I left so soon.”

“It’s okay,” Finn tells her, putting a hand on her shoulder. “If not for you, Luke wouldn’t have come. The Resistance wouldn’t be here.”

Rey smiles and breathes a laugh. “I’m sure he would have. For Leia, at least.”

“Yeah, maybe, but I still think you saved us.”

_ Just now, when we touched hands, I saw his future. As solid as I’m seeing you. If I go to him, Ben Solo will turn.  _

_ Rey, don’t do this.  _

_ You think you can turn him? Pathetic child.  _

A tear falls from Rey’s eye, and Finn frowns. “Rey, is everything okay?”

“No,” Rey says, “but I’m glad you’re here.”   


  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading. constructive criticism is always welcome.


End file.
